Astrology, elbert wade, PMAFA certified, consultant astrologer

No Sweat -- Let Buyers Get Burned

Copyright © 1999 - 2017 - Elbert Wade, PMAFA - Certified Professional Conusltant Astrologer


YES, it is totally true! You too, like so many thousands of others, can become a genuine INSTANT "astrologer" and get into the game of trying to make money without doing much if any work. What are the educational, study, training, experience requirements? NONE.

Here is what one guy on the internet says about having your own computer "horoscope" service:
Certified Astrologer Elbert Wade
"You don't have to 'believe in' Astrology.
You don't need astrological knowledge.
Heck, you don't even have to like Astrology."
Astrologer Elbert Wade professional certified consultant astrologer
However, you must be able to read at least on a third or fourth grade level, and also be able to "hunt and peck" on a computer keyboard -- or at least know someone who can do some basic reading, typing and addressing. That is ALL that's required of you personally. However, there are some "technical" requirements relative to what you must own. An explanation follows.


In order to be a genuine 'keyboard astrologer' you must own (or have access to) the following:

  1. A run-of-the-mill computer -- nothing fancy is required. (Just the usual "basics.")
  2. A printer -- color is an option but is not really necessary for printing 'one-size-fits-all' "horoscopes." (Note: Even if color is recommended, most programs will print out fine in black only.)
  3. A "chart-calculating-horoscope-reading" software program. These can cost up to hundreds of dollars, but if you search the net you may be able to find freeware you can use, which will get you in business for no additional cost! (What a deal!)
  4. Paper for the printer. Don't waste money on quality paper; buy the cheapest and thinnest you can find. (Using thin paper will also save on postage when you mail print-outs to "clients.")
    [GET WITH THE TIMES!!! If you have a little computer-savvy, you can email the whole thing to your customer, meaning you will need no printer, no paper, no address typing -- and there will be no mailing cost! Or better yet just put up copies on your site or elsewhere and send them link(s) so they can access and print at their expense. Absolutely NO sweat!]
  5. A typewriter for preparing mailing labels is a nice touch but you can just hand-letter addresses if you don't have a typewriter or don't know how to use the computer for this purpose. (No need to spend for anything not absolutely necessary since there is no guarantee you will succeed. Remember there are thousands and thousands of other 'keyboard astrologers' out there -- and they do have a big head start!)


  1. You must publish a web page. For help and guidance look here. Also check out this example. Get more useful pointers here.
  2. If you can afford it, rent a P.O. Box to receive orders -- and, most importantly, what you really are in business for: the MONEY!
  3. Never list your telephone number since you don't want to be bothered by customers who may ask you questions about Astrology! Remember, you only sell horoscopes; you don't explain or answer questions about them. ('Keyboard astrologers' can't be bothered with having to study Astrology to learn anything about it.)
  4. Do not give your residential address for the same reasons you don't want to publish your telephone number. (Important Note: If your home address or phone number is listed on any of the search engines, delete any/all you possibly can!)
  5. Don't let neighbors or friends know that you are a 'keyboard astrologer' or reveal anything about your new 'business.' (You don't want them prying or asking questions about your qualifications!)
  6. Never join a legitimate astrological organization that might expect you to honor any sort of ethics code. Doing so would only make you feel less-than-comfortable with conducting your very own so-called Astrology business. (Look around the net. You will find a number of fly-by-night outfits which will "certify" anybody for just about anything -- qualified or not. Be advised this will probably cost you money!)


Elbert Wade, PMAFA, has mentioned you would be facing stiff competition as a genuine 'keyboard astrologer.' For example, Google (March 2010) lists some 1,830,000 (that's one MILLION and 830 thousand pages) under "astrologers" -- (that's in English only). It's probable the vast majority of these pages advertise total astrological counterfeits -- so you will have a lot of company (and competition) operating as a genuine 'keyboard astrologer.' You need to know what they are saying on their pages. Visit as many as possible and make notes of what you like; combine them to compose your own web site. (After all, that's what most of them did.)


Should you call yourself an astrologer? Yes. Most people who buy cut-rate, computer-read horoscopes won't know the difference, and not one in a thousand would bother to check out your qualifications. By all means, call yourself "astrologer."

Should you offer a money-back guarantee? Why not? These bargain-hunter horoscope buyers will most likely think they got what they paid for and won't even think of complaining. In addition, the trouble to get a refund would cost the "dissatisfied" more time and money than would be recovered if a refund were forthcoming. You are on very safe ground offering a money-back guarantee. (After all, this is the philosophy all "junk-mail astrologers," "psychic-astrologers" and "astrologer-psychics" employ -- and quite profitably.) Besides, you could always claim you didn't get their request!

Should your advertising go beyond the internet? Absolutely yes, provided you can get it free or at very low cost. Put ads in all free sources available locally, and on the internet. If you choose paid ads, stick with the pulp magazines which are read by the less-savvy, and those more likely to buy such "services" as you will offer.

Astrology: Get A Real-Astrologer Horoscope Reading
Junk-Mail Astrologers -- Who Needs 'Em?
A "Certification" For Counterfeit Astrologers? Yes! It's As Easy As Pie!
All Secrets Revealed: Become A Counterfeit Astrologer In 10 Days--Or Less
Awful Hyphenated Astrologers

Another copyrighted real Astrology article by professional certified consultant astrologer Elbert Wade PMAFA

* Horoscope Services * Site Map * What's Your Sex Drive? * Feature Articles * Short Articles * Elbert Wade's Notebook * Bad Astrology * Find Your Ascendant * Unbottle Secret Genies * Astrological Satire * About Elbert Wade * Find Exact Age
* Read-a-Horoscope Tutorial * Sex and Age * Choosing a Mate * Free Horoscope * Phony Psychics * Notes * Feedback * Keyboard Astrology * Your Luck Potential * You -- Introvert or Extrovert? * Astro Turn-Ons/Turn-Offs * Horoscope(s) Order Page * Born on the Cusp? * You -- Leader or Follower? * Horoscope Facts, Figures and Symbols * Why Accurate Birth Time is Important * Contact Elbert * Sun, Moon, Planets details * Plan Perfect Party with Astrology * Moon's North Node * Astrological Vital Signs * About Horoscope Aspects * Astro Q & A * Discover Your Financial/Money Potential

Learn more about all 12 rising signs and their decans -- Ari Tau Gem Can Leo Vir Lib Sco Sag Cap Aqu Pis
Or, go to next "astrologers" Astrology article Or, go or return to full Site Map

This Page Only -- Visits Since 7/17/09: